heyreallygiger:

if i ever met satan the first thing i would say is “did it hurt…when you fell from heaven??” It would be hilarious. The next thing I would do is probably burst into flame and get impaled dozens of times but it would still be hilarious

undefinedarchetype:

best six second exchange i have ever seen in my life

kelekelo:

megapyon:

ʖ haha got ur nose

( ͡°_ ͡°)

koujakus-boyfriend:

sossidge:

me 11:59 September 30th

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me 12:00 October 1st

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it’s not even october and 90% of tumblr is like the second gif

dosopod:

“you don’t look depressed though”

oh yeah sorry i forgot to bring my literal dark cloud with me today

Friendly reminder that anyone born between 1985-1998 didn’t get their hogwarts letter because Voldemort’s ministry wiped out the record of muggleborns

bitchface12345:

Source:mom

  • Boston gays in 1773: OMG YAAAAAAASSSS, spill that tea HUNTY!!!!
A message from Anonymous
You should draw a puma wearing puma shoes.

pizzaotter:

iguanamouth:

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I fucking lost it here

liveasbravemen:

“I like clothes now. I have more energy. I sleep better. My sex drive is up. Blood’s flowing. I’m less susceptible to impulse. I’m in a different mode. When I was way out of shape, the idea of using whitening strips on my teeth seemed terrible. I have to do that every day? I’ll never do it. What you want is instant results when you’re out of shape. You want your teeth whitened in 45 minutes with the use of lasers. But when you’re in shape, you know it’s the result of doing a little bit every day. Moments aren’t just moments. A moment might be a week or a month. So instead of Boy, I’d love to eat this hamburger right now, I’m considering a little further into the future. I’m thinking, I eat that hamburger and that’s 1,200 calories, and I’m gonna work out tomorrow and lose 800 calories. I may as well eat a salad here, still do that workout, and then I’m actually making progress.” — Chris Pratt

liveasbravemen:

I like clothes now. I have more energy. I sleep better. My sex drive is up. Blood’s flowing. I’m less susceptible to impulse. I’m in a different mode. When I was way out of shape, the idea of using whitening strips on my teeth seemed terrible. I have to do that every day? I’ll never do it. What you want is instant results when you’re out of shape. You want your teeth whitened in 45 minutes with the use of lasers. But when you’re in shape, you know it’s the result of doing a little bit every day. Moments aren’t just moments. A moment might be a week or a month. So instead of Boy, I’d love to eat this hamburger right now, I’m considering a little further into the future. I’m thinking, I eat that hamburger and that’s 1,200 calories, and I’m gonna work out tomorrow and lose 800 calories. I may as well eat a salad here, still do that workout, and then I’m actually making progress.” — Chris Pratt

Favourite Screenwriters - Aaron Sorkin 

There’s a great tradition in storytelling that’s thousands of years old, telling stories about kings and their palaces, and that’s really what I wanted to do.❞